Arguably, I am an adult. If we’re going by the common consensus that you become an adult when you turn 18, then I am an adult and have been for 7 years. However, if we’re going by the dictionary definition of an adult which includes the words mature, sensible and not childish then it appears I’m not an adult and have quite a way to go.
There are people out there, some older and some younger than me, that seem to be *actual* adults. These are people that can do adult things that I can’t, seem to have their shit together and are just all round adulting successes. The opposite of me
and a lot of my friends. I mean, don’t get me wrong, I’m not a complete failure and get by just fine most of the time. After all, I have made it to 25 without any MAJOR disasters. But, there are a lot of things that *actual* adults seem to know how to do and I don’t. I’m not saddened or disappointed by this, I’m just a bit confused.
- 1. How do you know how to cook a roast dinner?
This question applies to anything that requires more than shoving something in the oven and setting a timer, but especially roast dinners. Where did you learn to cook a roast? When? Did you have to practice or did you wake up one day and know? I’m not sure I’ve ever peeled a potato let alone cooked a full Sunday lunch for the family. Yesterday I burnt toast. I’m starting to worry I’m the only person whose cooking skills don’t extend further than fajitas and chicken nuggets. Personally, I don’t like roast dinners but that doesn’t mean I’m not curious as to how people know how to cook them. What if Johnny Depp turned up at my door and demanded a roast? I’m going to be stuck.
2. When does saving money start?
Adults have savings. Not all, but most. I am the world’s worst at saving my money and I don’t understand how people resist the urge to spend it. Yeah, I’m sure it feels really good to add another £100 into your savings account and to be one step closer to a mortgage or a new car. But, do you know what else feels really good? Shopping for things I don’t need.
3. When do you learn your alcohol limits?
You can spot *actual* adults when you’re out – whether thats at a pub, bar or club – because they’re usually the ones that can still form a sentence and don’t look like a complete mess before midnight. I must’ve skipped that part of the adulting handbook because I still think having a shot with every drink is a good idea. Once, I went to the Natural History Museum with a friend for a cultural day ended up in a club in Camden at 3am. I’m still not sure how that happened.
4. How do you remember to pay things on time?
In all seriousness, is there an app for this that I don’t know about? In the past week alone I’ve narrowly missed forgetting to pay off my credit card and paid a road toll 6 days late.
5. How do you go to sleep at a reasonable time?
I’ll be the first to admit I have a terrible sleeping pattern, most of the time I can just think of better things to do than to sleep; but, this isn’t exactly helpful to having a productive day. Even if I need to be up at 6am for something, I’ll still be awake fannying around at 2am. I planned an early night a few days ago and found myself watching a documentary on the world’s tallest woman at 1am. I’m envious of people who go to sleep at a reasonable time, it feels like a very grown-up thing to do.
6. Do you ever stop making pointless purchases?
Today I found myself on Amazon genuinely considering buying halloween bandanas for my pets, a friendship bracelet kit and some Harry Potter Lego. Do I need any of these things? No. Are these things all in my Amazon basket ready for the checkout? Yes. The time and money I spend looking at/buying things I don’t need is excessive. I could use that for actual adult things like saving money or Googling how to cook a sodding roast.